I hope you get better, that music continues to have this healing effect.
Know that it also has a positive effect on people listening.
You help others feel better.
It's a very valuable gift when sharing such felt music. Thank you.
I also hope you continue to do so, that you find peace of mind.
Take care! ❤

This piece delivers effectively the feelings I can see in your description.

Music has many faces. Today you let us see a dark face, one that resembles a tired state of mind, one that has experienced a lot of shortcomings.

If you let this be your last song, true.. you may not risk any longer to feel that pain you are trying to avoid as much as you can. But you will also be left unable to have the other "ending", the one where you are able to make something that transmits energy and drive.

I'd say you should keep... holding on that small handle. Eventually, it may lead you to an unexpected opportunity you didn't see coming.

Don't force the handle open, or you might break it and lose even more confidence. Don't try to control it.

Let. it. sound.

Best of things.

I know the feeling all too well, and I know all the same that the worst thing you can do is give up hope. Even when it feels like nothing is going to change, you have to remind yourself that nothing is forever. There will always be another.

It won't be your last. I know it. Love ya, my friend. 💚