I wrote this script a long time ago. Seeing the Newgrounds Creepypasta 2023 event makes for a perfect opportunity to actually make it.

Transcript:

"One day I was going to the video game store to get a new video game. As an eight-year-old, it was perfectly safe for me to do such a thing. No one could tell me what to do. I was the toughest eight-year-old in school!

When I walked into the store, I was greeted by a strange sight. The clerk behind the counter was bumping his head against a wall covered in video games- and lots of red paint! It all looked realistic, mainly because it was in real life!

I told the Clerk I was in the market for a specific video game. The clerk emitted strange sounds- they sounded like the cries of the damned!

He was very nice, though. His arm- strangely multi-jointed- procured a nintendo 64 game- My favourite system! The label had been worn through, and was covered in masking tape. The title was written in a sharpie pen: "Super Mario's 64 Oceans-worth of Blood!" I love Super Mario 64, it's my favourite game. But when my 19-year-old brother moved out for college, he took my old copy with him. What a right jerk, am i right?

"How much is it?" I asked like the polite eight-year-old that I was.

The clerk's jaw unhinged and he replied "Five dollars."

What a coincidence! I had five dollars on me... And also coins for tax! I bought the game without a problem and skipped my way home.

So excited to play the game, I stuffed the cartridge into my nintendo 64 and powered it on. The game was just as I remembered it, except when Mario's large head appeared on-screen, he had pits where his eyes used to be, and he cried tears of blood that looked too good for a 64-bit machine to render, which is saying something! How strange. I paid it no mind, because the gameplay was the most important aspect of a video game. If the game's not fun, why bother?

The introduction played, and Princess Peach was a skeleton! That was also weird, but I didn't really care. When Mario first leaped out of the pipe, he landed, and his knees buckled. A loud cracking sound filled the room from the tiny television screen. Mario screamed in agony for twelve minutes!

How weird! I continued playing, but all Mario could do was crawl. I crawled up to the castle, and noticed that the moat was red, and looked like realistic red paint, much like back in the video game store! I started to think there was something untoward going on. This was not the game I remembered playing.

As I got closer to the door, the water level began to rise. Mario stumbled through the front doors, and the water level followed! The castle began to flood.

"Holy shit!" I yelled. My mom barged in and washed my mouth with soap. After that, I continued making Mario crawl up the stairs to escape the flood of realistic red paint! Wait a minute... That wasn't red paint! That was blood! It was sixty-four oceans-worth of blood! I didn't know the nintendo 64 could render that much ocean!

There was only one door I could open, and it led to Jolly Roger Bay. Mario clambered into the painting to escape the slowly flooding castle! When he emerged in the level proper, he fell into a flood of blood! Sixty-four planes of water made Mario splash around. (and by water i mean blood!) They all came from parallel universes!

But then, the ocean spelled out the words "You're dead!"

"That was very strange! I wasn't dead yet! I'm not dead!" I replied.

Then the nintendo 64 mutated a demon arm and stabbed me in the shoulder.

"Ow! Fuck!" I yelled. My mom barged in and cleaned my mouth with soap again. After that, I turned off the system and returned the game. The Clerk was very nice about it, and I exchanged the game for another nintendo 64 game: "Carmageddon: Christine's Revenge!"

It kept leaking blood, though. That was inconvenient!"