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Waking Dreams Part 1

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Part Two: http://www.newgrounds.com /art/view/aigis/waking-dr eams-part-2

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This is the first part of my comic for the Comic Jam that I organised in the art forum for this weekend. The idea was to make a comic entirely in 3 days, including all writing and designing.

The theme was 'Night'.

My comic, 'Waking Dreams', is 21 pages long (strung together as two files on the art portal), and comprises 75 individually drawn panels.

I hope you enjoy it.

Check out the other comic jam submissions here: http://www.newgrounds.com /bbs/topic/1267682

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Nice comic

Good story, well laid out, with a nice few hooks in there, so that we want to come back for the next one. I'd suggest that you research the layout of comics and make this one more of a "comic book" style layout, rather than a thin strip that descends down a page like at the moment. I'd suggest Order of the Stick as a basis, since that is laid out horizontally, with as many frames in lines below as are required.

I love the black and white of this - it kind of reminds me of old Beano or Dandy issues (showing my age there!), when they weren't all printed in colour. The one difference is that this sets the tone for something dark and mysterious. I'm intrigued along with the story as to how this will turn out.

Perhaps in an introduction issue, the walking down the stairs took up a little too much, but as we look at it for now, you've drawn each frame really well and the setup does kind of work. You could see to lose maybe three frames, without harming the integrity of the piece, thus leaving a little more space for plot exposition.

Could you leave it on more of a cliff hanger? Perhaps as she leaves the cafe with this mysterious old guy, who is asking her if she believes in magic, something is said, that makes the reader think a little deeper, while they wait for the next issue?

[Review Request Club]

Aigis responds:

The comic was drawn as 21 separate pages, but I didn't want to upload every one of them individually and flood my profile with the pages, so I linked them all together in two tall files.

Nice.

Have you written any books before this? If so, it really shows. The storytelling is very well done. The art is fantastic. It was really intriguing for some reason. Hopefully you'll upload the rest.

Review Request Club

Aigis responds:

Nope. I haven't.

I can't write anything more than a paragraph in prose before it becomes a parody of itself.

Good comic

Well I can tell this is possibly going to be getting awkward for her anyways. Really nice start to a comic series though as I find it rather interesting anyways. The piece seems to pick up where someone is waking up or maybe this is all a dream for them and they are not awake in the first place. Very interesting.

The concept if just using black and white together here is nice and makes it all very simple as well. Story seems pretty straightforward at the moment as well so that is also nice to see here. Wonder what will be happening next in this tale.

Overall, interesting start to a comic series.

Review Request Club

Interesting

With this first part of a comic, you really make the reader interested, make him/her want to read the second part of it.

Your style is good and suits the theme very well, theme is night, and the setting isn't the most cheerful there is. You don't really give a proper personality to either person in this first part, but in the second, you build somewhat of a personality around the girl, a lonely person that has basically given up on life.

The story isn't very deep either, but it's interesting because it keeps you reading on. You want to know exactly who the old man is, what he knows, and what he wants with her, creating a sort of cliffhanger to the first part.

Review Request Club

The first part makes me wonder...

... what the second part is all about. For now I feel lost in a film noir-styled world with a dash of random comedy towards the end. In fact, the way you ended it causes the story to potentially take any direction.

The art style is nice, yet I'm hoping to see more in the next part.

Great job ^_^

Credits & Info

Aigis
Artist
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Score
4.67 / 5.00

Uploaded
Aug 21, 2011
11:23 PM EDT
Category
Illustration
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496 x 7191 px
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312.7 KB
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