The art was nice and tightly wound, but it did absolutely nothing to enhance the comedy at all, and the writing came off very, very forced to me. It almost seemed like the length was the top priority, because these characters were absolutely not entertaining enough to carry such a long cartoon. You clearly know what you're doing when it comes to the technical stuff with cartoons, but the foundation of this one wasn't as strong as it needed to be, the writing definitely needs work. This could have been a 2-3 minute cartoon and been much more effective/entertaining.
Reviews for "The Overlord's Moopsie"
CarlDoonan responds:
Pacing is one of my biggest weaknesses as a storyteller. I tend to worry I'm telling a story too quickly to follow when I'm aiming for a 'snappy' pace, but then end up overcompensating and end up with something far too long-winded. I'm hoping to keep future projects more succinct and improve my writing.
It seemed to drag on a bit too long. The same joke could have been told in far less time just as effectively. The animation and music were fine, and the voice acting was a bit rough but not bad.
CarlDoonan responds:
Yeah, pacing has always been a weakness of mine. I'm going to try to make future shorts more succinct and snappy when I can.
It's...okay.
CarlDoonan responds:
Okay is better than bad! Thanks for your 2.5 stars : )
Long, drawnout, creative, but no punchline or humor. No action, and the plot is very, very dry. Nothing new or spectacular. Creativity is the largest redeeming feature.
CarlDoonan responds:
I can see how the short could be a bit on the dry side for some. I wasn't really aiming for anything super 'haha' funny or actiony, so it certainly isn't everybody's cup of tea. Glad you thought it was creative though!
It was okay but a little bland. I admit it had a few funny parts but they were just that. few
CarlDoonan responds:
I wasn't really aiming for a lot of 'haha' funny for this short, but it's nice that you found at least some of it funny. Thanks for the honest rating.