Incomplete, but well-written.
In spite of the incomplete animation and crappy sound quality, this is one of the better written flash movies around. What's even more surprising that this is from a member of the Lock Legion. I'm not going to let the Clock/Lock deal affect your score because I don't mind the Clock Crew or the Lock Legion as long as they produce good material and annoy the shit out of others. With that out of the way...
In terms of graphics, you are obviously in need of a few books on anatomy and animation. While the characters are better-drawn than what Rhete, Jerry Jackson, or Doug Sauncy (the Keegan's Truck guy); I think you could improve on your proportions a bit and the incomplete animation prevent this from getting a ten from me. In terms of sound, I like the songs from the Audio Portal you chose, which set a fitting mood I might add. Plus, the voice acting is great. However, I have to agree with Sir Davey (who happens to be a personal favorite of mine) on the sound quality. In terms of content, this is how an original cartoon on here should be done. You have a solid script and great diolog, unlike many high-rated cartoons which have above-average to excellent graphics, but lackluster to lame story, sub-par to inept directing, and weak diolog. If you go back and finish up the actual graphics and animation, you'll be set for greatness.
What I do like:
-Great script
-Great voice acting
-Good sound selection
-Original
-Respectable direction
What I don't like:
-Unfinished animation
-The sound quality on the voices needs improvement.
Overall: I see much potential from you as a writer, but your drawing and animation skills are in need of work. Here's an eight out of ten for what you have so far.