Reviews for Takuto - Episode 1

[Neotepid360]

I actually liked it

I liked it a lot. You have a real gift in writing. It is too bad some people are unable to be patient enough to read all of this. My suggestion is to put a little bit of animation-if you can-to the story. This way the people who don't necessarily read a lot will be able to watch it, and give a better rating. Besides that, the story was remarkably well written and worded. I wish I had that gift, the maybe writing assignments wouldn't be so hard. LOL. Keep up the good work.

MarkHansAvon responds:

Thanks for you responses/reviews everyone. I promise I have, in return for your time, taken every suggestion into fair and equal consideration.

Thanks again for your time. =)

[TransparentPresence]

Hmmm...Story-bookish...

Compliments for your story, it is good: informative and interesting. I also like the way you did the illustrations all sketchy and everything.

However, I was hoping you would do more illustrations for the different points in your story, I actually thought that the illustrations you showed seemed to go with the story pretty well, I just think you need to add more to have a bit more variety; perhaps you can work on that? Also the different insertions of story pop up a little to slowly...if you want to keep your audience interested perhaps adding chapter/scene selection could work. The music was okay-ish, more variety...it did start to get annoying

Still it's a 10/10 from me, I liked it alot. Looking forward to seeing more of your stuff!

MarkHansAvon responds:

Thanks for you responses/reviews everyone. I promise I have, in return for your time, taken every suggestion into fair and equal consideration.

Thanks again for your time. =)

[ShadowEpoch]

great writing

Decent story and writing. The story was interesting and I look forward to the rest.
My only suggestion if you are going to keep this format in your submissions, make illustrations that actually correlate to the current page. I felt that the background had absolutely nothing to do with the story.
On top of that it was poorly colored. It looked like a kinder gardener's art homework (okay maybe a little better than that).
And the music was a little annoying after a while. I'd suggest adding music that matches the mood of the story or just removing it and adding narrations or something.

MarkHansAvon responds:

Thanks for you responses/reviews everyone. I promise I have, in return for your time, taken every suggestion into fair and equal consideration.

Thanks again for your time. =)

[MiloticMaster]

Works for E-books

Nice story, I like the concept, but it progresses too slow, and its too short... Pls could you just animate it????? I feel that would bring out the story a lot better.

[sasukesamurai555]

Not bad, not bad.

You may not realize this, but your main character's story is very similar to Naruto's. Other than that it seems really interesting; I can;t wait to see what happens next, but, as others have said, you need more pictures, ones that match the current scene.

MarkHansAvon responds:

Thanks for you responses/reviews everyone. I promise I have, in return for your time, taken every suggestion into fair and equal consideration.

Thanks again for your time. =)