http://gawker.com/parents-outraged-after-bags-of-dick-shaped-gummies-sold-1633146925

Sounds like someone pulled quite the cock joke.

this is ridiculous

Many girls would scare many guys eating those. Or arrouse.

It would be weirder if someone gave these to their parents to snack on.

Heres a thought, the world is a testicle. The other teste is Venus. What is the shaft?

Sounds like a dick move.

At 11/29/14 02:59 AM, Voltage wrote:

At 11/29/14 02:56 AM, fmn335 wrote: Heres a thought, the world is a testicle. The other teste is Venus. What is the shaft?

the moon?

I guess. I was hoping someone would know the answer.

Why did you fail me son? Do I need to send you back to military school?!

At 11/29/14 03:05 AM, Voltage wrote: do I need to jam my cock so far down your throat you'll know what it feels like getting your penis tickled from the inside

such anger, much aggression. My word, Voltage.

At 11/29/14 02:56 AM, fmn335 wrote: Heres a thought, the world is a testicle. The other teste is Venus. What is the shaft?

I thought venus was a vagina and mars was a throbbing cock, at least that's what all the girls told us in elementary school

At 11/29/14 03:05 AM, Voltage wrote:

At 11/29/14 03:02 AM, fmn335 wrote: Why did you fail me son? Do I need to send you back to military school?!

do I need to jam my cock so far down your throat you'll know what it feels like getting your penis tickled from the inside

How about I turn MYSELF inside out and stick my intestines up your ass and jamb one of my lungs down your throat while my dick blood pours all over your genitelia while I french kiss your ears with my inside out tounge?

OO LA LA BABY!

At 11/29/14 03:05 AM, Voltage wrote: do I need to jam my cock so far down your throat you'll know what it feels like getting your penis tickled from the inside

Voltage.. It's.. It's not like I like you or anything. >:c

True story: I was working at Spencer's Gifts at Stonebriar Mall in Frisco, and we had Rainbow Cock Pops in the store. Nobody really paid attention to them...the occasional boy would try to make a gay joke to their friend, "Hur hurr, I found your candy" or girls would giggle at them, and there was nothing to it.

Well, for a few weeks, I was transferred to the Grapevine Mills Spencer's to cover a shift of a Sales Supervisor that was fired...and I HAAAAATED this Manager...she shoveled off all of her duties on me while she just dicked around on her phone in the back room all day... Eventually I got fed up with her bullshit, so she would be like, "Hey, go and re-organize all the hats" or something, so I just said "Fuck YOU, I'm going to write a song about Rainbow Cock Pops." and she didn't care...she was just like "Whatever." and went into the back room...so on clean receipt paper, I wrote this jingle:

How many licks can you give these dicks?
Its an oral treat thats fun to eat!
Its tasty!
Its fruity!
Its filled-up with cream!
Its long! Its strong!
Its sort-of-oblong!
The taste of an erotic dream!
Its Rain-Bow! Cock-Pops!
Buy 'em at Spencers in Malls!
Rain-Bow! Cock-Pops!
The only candy-
WITH BALLS.

The ending bit kinda sung like Ren & Stimpy's "LOG" jingle

So to kill time and have fun with it, I would grab these piece of shit Rainbow Cock-Pop candies, one in each hand, and I would dance around and sing that jingle to customers, and they were fucking flying off the shelf. Mallrats would come back with a squad of their friends / with a gaggle of their friends / with a flock of their friends / with a murder of their friends / with a cluster of their friends and nag me to sing the song for them....THEN THEY'D BUY SOME MORE.

I taught it to my best friend and Sales Associate from my original store the jingle, and we would dance together and sing the Rainbow Cock-pop jingle to much applause and joy.

Suddenly the manager had to point out that we were the highest selling store specifically for that one product.

It was one of my most hardest achievements. I was throbbing with joy.

At 11/29/14 03:50 AM, Phobotech wrote: True story

Respect bro. I would have bought rainbow cock pops from you any day.

At 11/29/14 03:50 AM, Phobotech wrote: It was one of my most hardest achievements. I was throbbing with joy.

I hate that I'm in love with you

At 11/29/14 02:56 AM, fmn335 wrote: Heres a thought, the world is a testicle. The other teste is Venus. What is the shaft?

Doesn't greek or roman mythology actually say that the Earth is one of Zeus's/Jupiter's or Crono's testicles? I think the moon is the other testicle.

At 11/29/14 03:56 AM, Tremax wrote:

At 11/29/14 03:50 AM, Phobotech wrote: It was one of my most hardest achievements. I was throbbing with joy.

I hate that I'm in love with you

I love that I'm in love with him.

At 11/29/14 04:03 AM, Radaketor wrote:

At 11/29/14 02:56 AM, fmn335 wrote: Heres a thought, the world is a testicle. The other teste is Venus. What is the shaft?

Doesn't greek or roman mythology actually say that the Earth is one of Zeus's/Jupiter's or Crono's testicles? I think the moon is the other testicle.

Those people knew how to worship the right gods/godesses!

It's only shaped as a cock for the time it's in the baggie and in their hands. Once it hits their mouth it's a giant mushy mess

Wow, the guy who thought this up must've been a big dick.

At 11/29/14 03:50 AM, Phobotech wrote: True story

I've seen those! I love you Phoebe. That's my nickname for you now. Phoebe.... Phoebe.

Phoebe.

At 11/29/14 03:32 AM, yurgenburgen wrote: what a bunch of sheltered fucking prudes
who gives a shit if your compressed gelatin and E-numbers are shaped like cocks
don't like it? send them to me, I'll eat them
holy fuck, like seriously, who fucking cares

I think the problem is they were selling them to kids though. Just the fact these existed I don't think was the issue. If they were sold in sex shops no one would care. More like a parent gives a kid some money to go buy candy and they buy that. Parent and kid think nothing of it until they get home and open it up and start eating the candies. Kid doesn't know any better. Parent probably quick glanced at the store and thought they were gummy bears.

Now really parents should use a bit more discretion in what they let their kids buy, but at the same time the stores probably should have had a minimal age required to buy those. Is it really appropriate for some little kid to be eating dick candies I ask you?

These candy dongs are totally raging right now.

One might say they are... all the rage.

At 11/29/14 04:27 PM, NeonSpider wrote: eating dick candies

Well, it gives whole new meaning to telling someone to go eat a bag of dicks. lol.

LOL my friend would like those.

That must've been a jolly good laugh.

At 11/29/14 12:27 PM, Monster-64 wrote: Do they have a juicy center?

Does yours have a juicy center?