You don't write lyrics often so I'm really impressed by how good they are! They evoked strong emotions in me, which you know doesn't happen very often with music. Much of composition is phenomenal, and there are so many delightful chords in there. I think I caught a few major chord anomalies, which were really sweet. I like the piano break in the middle, and it adds some welcomed variation.
I love these lyrics, and I feel like I can relate to it a lot. The line corresponding to the song title is the most ambiguous, but I found an interpretation that makes sense to me.
I feel like the way the song was produced makes it sound much colder that what you might have untended. The piano itself sounds cold probably both because of both the timbre and the dynamic range, and it sounds more upfront than usual. The vocals are also pretty upfront and seem to be compressed a bit. Overall, I feel that there's a bit too much compression and it slightly hinders the conveyance of emotion. I think the composition itself is very high in emotion, but the aforementioned factors make it difficult for the emotional appeal to be fully realized. Near the end you increased the reverb and that was really nice! I wish the entire piece sounded more like that.
I think this track would sound even more awesome with a more dreamy atmosphere. This is a fairly pensive piece, and I think that having a lot of reverb would reflect the vastness of consciousness.
The vocals sound a little flat to me, but I think I perceive it that way due to the great contrast in dryness with the piano.
I actually kinda agree with TL about the transition at :20, but there's one important thing he didn't mention: the contrast in volume can be startling when one listens to the first time. As I said earlier, this piece sounds a bit over-compressed, so perhaps that transition sounded fine beforehand and you overlooked it post-compression.
This is an amazing track, and I'm glad you tried something new!
Good luck in the competition!