Nothing's perfect, but...
Ok
Your movie has several good points: the music is good and not too loud, wich make the reading easier. The information in the texte are correct and the way you bring them ( making like if it was the guy that was telling it all) is interesting.
BUT ( because there's always one) it's static. There's nothing movieng, nothing to catch the attention of the viers. You need too had, you know, this little animated detail that catch the eye and had life to your movie (blinking eye, moving clouds, floatting hair...). Also, the texte is hard to read: it's small, compact and (sometimes) black on black. You got to take care of this. The simplest solution would be to had a box at the bottom of your screen to write the texte. You can give it any style you want to ( robotic, romantic, comic). Or you can write it in a manga style bubble, to support you subject.
Last thing, when you had your song to your project, go in its properties and scroll the box where it's written "repeat". Select "Loop" and your song will play in loop during all the time the viewer will be, well, viewing.
Good luck.