Good But Long....
1st chapter of this Broken Saints series, and in my opinon was made very well. The Broken Saints team done a very fine job in making this, the only down sided is that it is very long and even though I didn`t mind it to that extent, It may make others get bored, but anyways this get a 7 from me, looking forward to the rest of the series.
Impressive
I really didn't expect much. I clicked on this out of curiosity, randomly browsing through the site. I thought it would be another short little piece or a completely useless little video. I found it to be a great video, which sets up the series quite nicely. That is why it is "slow" it is the set up, the introduction. And honestly, cseidi, the writing is actually pretty good. Yes it is cliched but honestly, what isn't these days. I seriously enjoyed this video and hope to enjoy the entire series.
?.......
Slow......
Boring.....
wasted time.....
Strong visuals & audio, writing needs improvement
I actually don't have a problem with the graphic novel presentation. The audio works, and visually, the artwork and narrative are fine. The writing, however, needs serious improvement, and because your work relies so heavily upon language, I give you only 4 stars.
The spoken narrative tends to rely too heavily on pseudo-poetic language, which really falls short of the mark. Whatever below commentators might say, the language lacks vivid imagery and suffers from a dearth of originality. In poetry workshops, people usually toss around two very useful rules that I feel could improve your writing. The first is, "Show, don't tell"--i.e. use imagery and metaphor to convey your narrative rather than droll explanation or image-scarce language. The second is a formula for crafting solid images and metaphors: apt + surprising. You want your image to adequately represent the subject but to be surprising enough to provoke pleasure, surprise or laughter in the reader (this formula also works for humor, painting, cinema, etc.). As it is, your language, which desires profundity but lacks it entirely, is neither apt nor surprising--it comes across as sub-par, pretentious, and wanting of serious insight.
That said, not all of the writing was bad. For the most part, the writing seems to improve as the story progresses, although it slumps whenever it returns to religious themes, which are quite cliche. Cliches are nothing new to Newgrounds but they are seldom accompanied by such serious effort; the combination of sobriety and servile religious overtones is disconcerting, particularly since you invoke the words of an atheist who famously declared the death of God. I find myself doubting whether the author understands Nietzche's engagement with the Abyss.
Nevertheless, I feel the series deserves a further look--if only for its unique visual presentation--so I will try to finish it out.
A Masterpiece...
Never have I watched something so majestic and filled with wisdom, I couldn't watch it to the end, because it was a little overwhelming, the effect it brought on me. Nevertheless, it's the best thing I've seen in my lifetime.