Not bad, but needs work...
Beat choice: 10
Lyrically: 9
Mixing: 6
Swagger: 7
Overall Presentation: 7
Lyrically and the choice of beat were the dominate elements of this track. Certain parts of all three of your flows could've been executed a little stronger...but it wasn't anything that truely hurt the track.
What did hurt it on the other hand was the inexperience in mixing. The instrumental was far too powerful over the vocals which landed up drowing out your words and your impact. If you bring the vocals up to a flush level with the beat, it'd make decent mixtape material.
Keep droppin homie.