Profanity!???!!!???1!!
grow up men. that's just inexcusable. If i want to hear people cuss i'll pay a hobo. You're never going to go anywhere serious with "Hey motherfucker are you talking to me now?" as your first line. Don't put a 45 second solo at the start, for instance, don't do :
I don't ever wanna be like you
I don't fucking wanna be like you
I don't ever wanna be like you
I don't fucking wanna be like you
No more!
Do:
I don't ever wanna be like you
I don't wanna live like you
I don't ever wanna be like you
I don't wanna be like you
No more!