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Monologue by Death

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A kinda macabre monologue by Death.

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Nice animation

This was a nice animation and yes I have to say it was kind of short but I found it to be pretty interesting and you have some good ideas as this was notbad just stretch this out a bit more so it can be a bit longer anyways nice job

~~THINGS TO IMPROVE ON~~
Could be a bit longer

~X~

Props for that cigarette animation.

~M~

This was brilliant! It was short, but the concept is delivered so well that this barely matters, or almost seems intentional, like it's a shower thought of Death's. The animation is superb and flowing, especially the gestures, and the delivery from the voice actor is spot on. I loved the monologue and thought it was both intelligent and well written, and coupled with the acting, this is an animation worthy of entry in the top 10 of the month.

Like the smoke, interesting monolog. keep it up!

Not a bad start. You have an interesting concept of an "outsider's glimpse" of the human experience. It was short, however. I believe you would do well for yourself to dedicate some more time and develop this as a struggle to conceive of an utterly human experience by someone otherwise entirely incapable of it.
Death could follow this start with some of his observations over the years, mostly of people along his journeys. He could suggest that the original description is somehow inaccurate, since all the thoughts had to exist, and at the pinnacle moments of fear he'd observed (say in people he was "picking up") they were absolutely still, as without a single thought in their minds. Or something...
Let him develop his own concept of what fear could be, and how it might feel to be afraid. Or you could even suggest that he's picked up souls around sexual encounters, and found some reasonable similarity between those frozen in fear at seeing him, and those in near lifeless ecstasy just after the act and slightly before they'd realized he was there at all... So maybe construct a punchline that fear isn't too much different from the height of sexual pleasure... and maybe he thinks he's really doing people a favor... (lolz)
In any case, you have a great starting place, but I honestly think you'd be well advised to flesh it out. Otherwise, in the technical sense, everything worked well. Animation was fluid and consistent. Sound sync'ed up well, and the voice work was clear, distinctly in character, and maintained its consistency throughout.
So don't forget to breathe, relax, and keep on keeping on... if you don't flesh it out now, revisit...

darkn00bknight responds:

HI Maddude,

Thats an interesting plot idea. I'll say, though, that I'm not a huge fan of cartoons that are sexualized. I'm more interested in the ability to create characters that can embody a feeling or an idea, like Death having an impossibly big mouth to make him feel more like a monster.

Also, for now, I'm going to try to put out an animation every few weeks so the length needs to stay fairly short so I can finish them :)

It sounds like you just might have found a story to pursue yourself though!

Credits & Info

Views
4,275
Faves:
26
Votes
234
Score
3.87 / 5.00

Uploaded
Mar 12, 2017
1:51 PM EDT
Genre
Drama