Castlevania Priest Battle

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In the NES game parody of ours, Simon is back in town after killing Dracula in Castlevania 2... but now he finds that the priest won't even restore his health! It's quite obvious that this shit-talkin' priest needs to be taught a lesson or two!

Controls are:
Z = Jump
X = Whip
Click or Spacebar = Start

(if you have problems controlling the character, just click on the game and the problem will resolve itself

And don't forget to return to town after you beat the game, because there's a "Secret Button" on your keyboard that you'll DEFINITELY want to push while you're in town! >:) You WILL need to CLOSE THE WINDOW and re-open the game to return to town just so you know. And you DON'T have to beat the game to access the secret item, but isn't it more fun to save it for last? And it doesn't tell you what the secret button is, you gotta figure out that for yourself! ;)

Enjoy the blasphemy of Priest Battle!
If you want to play it without the newgrounds pop-up ads or download it, you can get it at:


Simon kicks everyone's ass!

Ooh! Ooh! Teacher, can I say the answer? It's the asterisk above the number pad! What happens next is even more hilarious if you remember the old 80's game Karate Champ. Good job on this mini-game, I-Mockery!

cool game :D

dude! I finally beat Jesus in this game :DD


Woah! This is sooo good! You actually have to think about the second battle, and the controls are lovely. Very well thought game, congrats!

you killed Jesus! hahaha

That was the best ending of any game yet.

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cool and fun. Makes me wanna actually go play the game. I pressed the secret button, but didn't really understand what the f*ck it was supposed to be. It was cool though, and jesus was kinda hard to beat keep at it your good.

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Credits & Info

2.98 / 5.00

Jul 31, 2001
11:08 PM EDT
Action - Other
  • Daily Feature August 2, 2001