At 11/9/08 12:31 AM, Imperator wrote:
No and I'd be hard pressed to find one, mainly because porn being illegal for kids, such research would have a hard time passing an ethics committee.
Fair point. :P
The research on all these things is pretty clear, right down to violent video games. They have an effect on kids, and it's not a healthy one. Most kids turn out alright, most adults drink responsibly, and most people don't view women as play things.
I'm not so sure we can call the effect "negative". Without context, and other information, sure it might be, but is that really how we must judge everything? Without context, a kid with a rock can have a negative effect.
But these things are all regulated so that people ARE responsible enough to handle them.
War games are regulated? Shit, I guess we better stop selling 40k to those 10-year-olds! ;-P
My point is this: what place is it for anyone other than parents to regulate these things? I was curious and learning about sex when I was about 11-12. My parents weren't the instigators, nor really the facilitators, of that curiosity, or the ways in which I learned. However, their general demeanor and lessons gave me the basis in which to put the information in context, and use it in a reasonable fashion. Some kids wouldn't start as early, some would start earlier. It's an individual thing.
What possible motivation can drive someone to presume 8 year olds are responsible enough to know about porn, which ANYONE should agree is not necessarily the best representation of sex?
If the child is curious about it, then why not answer the questions he or she has?
That's my complaint. It's not that I find porn should be banned, it's that I find the age regulation fine as is, and there's absolutely NO reason I see why kids need to be asking mommy and daddy "what's double penetration?"......
Lol... my sister asked my dad what a "blowjob" was when she was 8, nearly gave him a coronary. You don't get to choose when those questions pop up. Let the child, him/herself guide the learning. They're remarkable at setting their own pace for learning.
Can a 5th grader handle the following:
How to have safe sex
how to deal with pregnancy
How women should be treated
What constitutes a healthy sexual relationship
What constitutes an unhealthy sexual relationship
What is improper sexual behavior (and why)
What is proper sexual behavior (and why)
Maybe, depends on the 5th grader. I could have handled, had I not died from embarrassment, many of those topics had my parents raised them. While I may not be the most average of folk, I'm sure I'm hardly alone.
More importantly: Should a 5th grader even have to be concerned about the above things?
5th graders... not parents, not society, and certainly not government... decide when they're interested in things. And sometimes, the situation forces itself from outside, through abuse from adults, other kids, and other unpleasantness. Having the ability and the resources to cover these topics, including pornography, is a very important aspect of parenting. Now that's not to say that you'll need to have a copy of Back Door Sluts 9 on hand to illustrate, but a kid WILL find a way to learn about it if he or she becomes interested.
When the hell did safe sexual procedures; "fantasy, rape, dangers, pleasures and all that stuff" become standard for parenting?
From the dawn of time. Sorry, teaching kids about what sex is is one of the basics of parenting.
When I was in 5th grade I didn't worry about all that shit, why the hell should I make my kid learn that shit?
You shouldn't. However, you also shouldn't force them to not learn about it until you're ready. You wait until THEY'RE ready.
I think kids should know three things:
1.) Don't cross the street without looking both ways
2.) Don't talk to strangers
3.) Momma bear rules the house
Other than that.......how about just lettin the kid be a kid?
Fine... now I'm going to have to welcome you to the real world, where shit ain't so neat and clean. What happens when your 10-year-old asks what those magazines at the corner store are? What about the "blocked" channels? What about older siblings/friends showing them stuff. You don't get to choose when they're introduced to porn... however, you CAN prepare them for how to deal with it beforehand (even if not explicitly), and also teach them how to deal afterwards.
I don't think porn should be accessible to kids because kids are not responsible enough to handle the ramifications of proper sexual behavior in Western society, NOR do I think that's something they should even be concerned with.
Again, you're thinking about this like you'll actually be able to block websites from a kid who'll probably be able to design a website by the time he's 5 and can run circles around your lame excuse for a v-chip with a few remote presses. YOU DON'T GET TO CHOOSE. I'm not saying that porn should be marketed or sold to kids.... merely that we as people and parents need to back off the vilification and realize that like it or not, they're going to be exposed, and they'll need information in order to handle it in a healthy way... just like with anything, be it actual sex, making friends (one of the earlier lessons) sharing, fairness, driving a car, getting a job, etc.
If you and Pox and whoever the hell else really feel kids should be allowed to see porn at such a young age, you tell me why, because I think kids are growing up faster than they need to already, and parents have enough stress. The birds and the bees talk revolving around PORN of all things should not be on Tuesday's schedule right before peewee baseball.....
I simply think we need to un-taboo everything about physicality, nudity and sexuality (yes, I realize the futility of that, but still...). Once it's not such a cultural boogey-man, then people, kids especially, will be more able to handle it in a healthy way.