For a number of years now i've always had a past memory i have blocked out. Hoping it'd just go away and i can just get on with my life. But it doesnt stop, i've come to accept what i did and whether i like it or not i'm going to have to live the rest of my life in fear and guilt. I feel writing this on Newgrounds may not only warn people of how easily it could happen, but it might make me feel better too. So this is my story, NG.
When i was about 13, i was a quiet kid. i did my homework and handed it in on time. I was a hard worker and got good grades. I was a normal, possibly above-average, intelligent kid. There was one subject at school that i despised, Art. Not because of the subject itself, but because of the people in it.
There were these 3 kids. Everybody at school feared them cause they knew how to throw a punch and proved themselves throughout school life in a number of fights in which they came out top dog. Unfortunatly i had to sit next to them. Laughing it up like a pack of hyenas, they would disrupt the class by making noises and throwing paint brushes at people. My school was pretty rough, nobody got suspended. So these kids didnt get disiplined. Anyway, i was tormented by them everytime i was in the class with them. When one of them was off sick i saw it as a sign from god of mercy. Just like all boys that age when split up and put into seperated groups in a group project, they would be silent and get on with it.
To my horror one time, i was paired with the ring leader so to speak. The main guy that the other two looked up to. He was a troubled kid. His dad was arrested and convicted of attempted murder on a man who was having an affair with his wife. The whole school knew about it, but nobody dared mention it. We were given a drawing exercise. We both had to draw out a picture we were given. There was an akward silence throughout until the very end. I went over to the main desk pencil pot thing to get a different colour pencil, then the kid came up behind me, his eyes bulging, grinding his teeth and his blood boiling. He calmly said in a physcotic whisper "After school, i'm coming for you."
I was terrified. I was beyond terrified. I didnt even know what i did wrong. I paniced throughtout the rest of the day. I didnt want a fight. I was a pacifist, i didnt beleive in violence but diplomacy and understanding. Clearly this kid wasnt interested in talking. He wanted me in a puddle of blood, dying.
So throughtout the day i tried to think up a way of leaving the school when it ended without drawing attention to the kids. There were 2 main gates, one in the back and one at the front. The 3 kids basically had an army of friends who were just as scary who were willing to find me too afterschool and bring me to him. So it went past 3pm and the bell rang. My heart stopped, i sweated. I took a deep breath. I got up and ran out of the class like lightning. Luckily, the class that i was in before the school finished was the closest to this area down next to the lower field at the back of the school that had a pathway leading into a forest. So i instantly ran down to the lower field where all the athletics and field days happen. I turned right when i got to the field, by this point i was out of sight from the main school.
I ran down into the forest path and stopped behind a tree for a second to catch my breath. I calmed down my heavey breathing and just as i was about to pick up my bag again, i hear twigs on the ground snap a few yards away from me. My instant fear was it was them, walking towards me or atleast trying to find me. I poked my head round the large tree i was hiding behind and quickly scanned the enviroment straight ahead of me. I didnt see anything. It was a relief. A BIG relief. So i started walking towards the end of the forest path which was only a stones throw away. I got to the end of the path. I was at a main busy road i hadnt recognised before. I was still scanning 360 degrees of wherever i went. By the time i got back onto my road i was convinced that i was safe. The road i live on the very long, and has twists and turns everywhere. I had one final right turn before i could see my house in the distance.
And then i saw them. AT MY HOUSE. Out on the car space outside my garage. I didnt know what to do. I considered phoning my mum and asking them to clear off. But i didnt have a phone and later i realised she was at work. And so was my dad. They both wouldnt be back until 10pm. I wasnt going to wait 7 hours. So i thought to myself - " Maybe i should just walk up to my house and let myself in?". I mean, why not? DO these kids really have the balls to break into my house if i was in there on my own and they knew that? I was tired of thinking and i started walking. Then about 8 of them all came up on bikes and started screaming abuse. I started walking faster then started running. I finally made it to the house unscratched. I quickly slammed the door and prayed they would leave. But for some reason, they knew my parents werent in. I was standing at a distance from the door around the corner to my kitchen which faced the door. I started hearing thumps. Loud banging. The peered out the living room windows and saw the kid in Art class kicking in the door. The phone started ringing. I thought it would have been one of them outide trying to scare me. Either way i had to pick it up. It was my mum. She got the night off and was coming home! I slouched to the floor sliding down the wall i was leaning on. All i had to do is wait.
The kicks stopped about 10 mins after that. My mum said she'd be home in about 20 mins. I just had to hold out. Then, i hear a noise. It sounded like a door handle moving. I was looking at the front door and saw no movement out the door window. I turned around and was punched in the face hard by a distorted figure. Uncharacteristically, i blew a fuse and jumped on the unknown person. My eyes were bad and had to were glasses, i focused and saw his face. It was him. The crazy kid. I kept punching him in the face repeatedly, then he kicked me off of him. He got up and went over to the kitchen and got a kitchen knife from the knife holder. I was shocked and scared and didnt know what to do. I had to think fast so kicked his knees when i was on the ground. He fell and dropped the knife, i tried to stop him by jumping on him and tried to restrain him. It was no good, he wiggled and got the knife. I grabbed the wrist he was holding the knife in. He pushed the knife down to the direction of my chest. I pushed his wrist for dear life. My dog came running down the stairs and bit his leg. He screamed and released the pressure of the force he was putting on the knife, whilst i still pushed into him. I stabbed him in the chest. He fell to the ground. He went pale and his yes rolled back and closed. There was a pool of blood. I killed him. I took his life. I went into deep shock. What had i done? I crawled up into a ball and started crying.
I didnt hear any noise from outside anymore, the kids must have got bored and left. I heard the gravel on the ground when a car pulled up. It stopped. I heard footsteps. Then the door opened. It was my Mum. She screamed and said " You're moving with your auntie and uncle in bel-air". I begged and i pleaded with her day after day. But she packed my suitecase and sent me on my way. She gave me a kiss and then she gave me a ticket so i put my walkman on and said "i might as well kick it". First class yo this is bad, drinking orange juice out of a champagne glass. Is this what the people of bel-air are living like? Hmmm, this might be alright.
