That intro is way louder than the rest of your track. I recommend turning it down some.

You've got some interesting textures here. One thing I notice is that that snare is really loud compared to everything else in the track, at least until the kick comes in. I would recommend turning it and the kick down somewhat. Also watch those boxy low mids.

My other critiques could probably be best summed with what Kwing said. As more elements come into the track, volume starts kind of pumping, and because everything sticks relatively to the same progression, I never really feel any anticipation moving from section to section. A lot of this is the relatively flat drums and lack of overarching melody.

There are also long sections without a bassline, and if you study music theory, you will notice the bass colors the feel of chords more than any other instrument. Going without it leaves people feeling confused. I definitely recommend studying some principles of chord progression, lead writing, and song structure. There are a multitude of tutorials I would recommend, such as those by Signals Music Studio, Ben Levin, etc.

As for mixing and mastering, there are a lot of places where this mix just stabs me in the ear, like 4:45. Watch out for that. Recommend some tutorials in that area too.

That said, there is nothing particularly bad about the writing of this piece. It's a bit samey, but if the volume were somewhat normalized, it'd make a decent theme for like, moping around in your room in a Pokemon game, if you get my meaning. It's not exciting, but it's not distractingly awful or annoying. With some hard work and study, I have no doubt you've got it in you to blow this thing out of the water, so keep at it.

Lemme know if you're interested in any free music production resources, too. There's plenty of 'em to go around!

Thanks for coming out to NGUAC!

I'm not sure if it's that there are too many layers here or that they're mixed improperly, but even though it sounds like there's a harmony for certain parts here, it's kind of hard to decipher what's going on in it. The only thing that's consistently audible from start to finish is the drum, which is pretty consistent and not all that interesting. I finished listening to this and didn't feel like there was much anticipation to hold my interest aside from the first minute or so.

Wow. Blown away by the quality of this top notch audio. 0_o