Your version is better...

Your remix gives more weight to the lyrics and to the voice of the girl. You create a density that doesn't exist in the original song. Those melodic sentences and the simple piano touches does help you to do so, cause in the first version I feel that it's just a voice on some flat beats. I really appreciate what you've done with it. Very very nice ordering of all the different instruments, where you mix atmosphere notes, which are holded exceedingly (it's not a reproach here, it's awesomely done) and these small interventions of the piano. Great contribution of the drums, that bring a sort of cutting in the overall and doesn't let this song fall into too much romantism or emotive quality.

Ok now, comparing to what you tried to do... that's to... dubstep ! If I understood well :)
I'm not a professional of this kind of music, but I couldn't say it's pure dubstep to me. In my opinion, it kepts some accents of... dance ! Yeah that's strange, but some of your instruments sounds like that (like one of the first that enters in the very beginning). And even the dubstep bass is too "soft", not enough trenchent. I also wondered why you made a change in your drums cell at a moment. And then I heard your transition, and I realized why. But this drum break is typical of dance-techno songs, even if it's not that cliché here, but you got me, the acceleration of the kick from unique to double, etc, is quite characteristic of a certain kind of music.

Overall, i'd say it's excellent. The work on the voice is impressive (with this kind of echo in the end of the track) and it's perfectly inserted in an intimate little musical space and that does sounds like "something quiet" and private. The use of the breathing of the girl as a break after the acceleration of drums that suddenly cut is an amazing idea.
Very original song well realized, a very good job once again.
I'm just a little skeptical about the "dubstep". ;)
5

This was pretty sweet

At 1st I was kinda lyk wow I wonder how the wobble bass is gonna sound with this kinda song & when it came, I smiled. The wobble went perfectly with the song and the voice repeatin' was great. Even though this was a demo, I still was expectin' more to the wobble bass. You didn't have to change how much it wobbles, but in variety like the yayaya's & stuff like that. That'd be cool if you made the voice go yayaya to. The drop was also perfect when that came cuz I was also expectin' a really good drop like how you put it in. I hope the finished version will be as awesome!!! 9/10 & 5/5