A few pointers.
I do like it, but it seems extremely out of balance in some areas and is missing some things.
1. Melody is not defined enough. I can slightly hear one, and it really fits the song. It is a melody better quiet, but not THAT quiet.
2. The really deep bass created some sort of groan that doesn't fit the general... ambiance of the song. Try some other instrument. Play around with it.
3. It seems like one long build up to nothing. I like the crescendo, but you could have made it perhaps four to eight measures shorter, and have some sort pause for a second with the melody.
Overall, this is a nice start that should be revisited. Good job and keep writing! 4/5 7/10
I really like the overall beat and the slowly crescendoing music. But I think it may have been better with a sudden break in music before carrying on dramatically in a lower octave. But that's just me. Good job by the way!