Dude, I must've missed this when you posted it up, sick as hell.
Author Comments
Some more 4 string acoustic
Lyrics:
wake up and fill a bowl with water,
pop it in the microwave.
Don't think about nobody's daughter,
because the heart makes you a slave.
now pour that water through the coffee grounds,
light a cig and start the day.
don't really care 'bout what you gotta do,
and no one's got the guts to say-
you're creepy mother fuck and your apartment is a cave.
Got the visage of a bastard and you're scarin all the kids away.
go walk the dog around the rentals,
but don't set foot outside the gate.
takes more than scars and a bad visage,
to keep certain people away.
powder heads think you have money,
and you politely prove them wrong.
all it takes is 4 words said to you,
and like a rocket you go off.
oh you creepy mother fucka, they'll remember you can't pay.
now if you step out, you hope you're scarin all the bums away.
Back in your den of sin you're thinkin'
What kinda night will come your way.
You know you shouldn't do no drinkin.
but just might do it anyway.
got no malevolent or evil plans,
just music and video games.
your a kind polite and cordial guy,
you hope no one finds out (you're) that way.
oh you're a friendly motherfucka but you'd rather be lonely.
yeah it's just the way you like it so you'll be that everyday.
-
*spoken(trail off)
except when someone says "it's only a dollar". Like man whatÂ
the fuck do you think "I don't have any money" means?
or "I don't carry cash"? every time you ask I say
the same damn thing what the fuck
AVKid4 responds:
hey thanks so much!
Giving this 4 and a half stars even though there's obviously a lot to be desired, simply because I think this can serve as a demo and has a potential to be really, really great. My advice? Record this properly, this is gonna be worth it. You've got something here. The riff is simple and nothing too fancy or groundbreaking, but it works. The lyrics are amazing though. Relatable, simple enough to be understood by a mass of people yet not dumb. If you don't have musicians near you, I recommend Fiverr. Record a demo on a click and find a drummer there to lay down the drums track. Hell, get a producer there to help you arrange some more parts for this if you don't have the means to do it yourself. You won't regret it. This really has some potential, I'm not just saying that. I have spent hours here going through piles of audio trash and random ideas and this idea stands out. Do something more with this. I would use the acoustic guitar as the basis, add drums and bass on the first pre-chorus at around 0:23, perhaps add a pretty clean, little bit overdriven electric guitar reinforcing the main riff at the start of the second verse at 0:43. Put in some solo after the second chorus. The choruses could use some reinforcement, perhaps a backing vocal harmony and a little synth hook after each line of the chorus. Just my opinion. Hope to hear this one day fully developed and slapping away somewhere. ;)
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AVKid4 
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