Originally recorded in 2014... I pitched my voice up because I wasn't confident in making a girl voice. Now... I don't care and I made the exact voice I wanted to make in high school. Not a perfect girl voice, but liked something a little off and still probably vaguely girly. Like I matched it pitch for pitch, hit the intonations better, and flowed better too. Being trans unlocks voice powers, I swear.

Lyrics:

Twerkfest 19 hundred and 59

Back to the month known to us as July

Only fitting we go back to this month

This is when the story was made, and stuff.

It was 4 o'clock in the afternoon

I was working at McDonald's since June

My boss got off work a little early

and asked me to close it up with Curly.

I will admit, I was nervous

Closing with a guy who gives bad service

But hey, you know me, I'm a G

A challenge is craved by a woman like me!

We flipped burgers and fries for an hour or more

When some guy came in through the front door

He pulled a gun out to Curly's head and said:

"Leave this place with me, or your dead."

I was at the grill, crying and dying and more

But Curly just looked at the barrel with scorn

"You think a gun will give you a chance?

Go home and bring a new date to the dance."

At that moment, the guy dropped his gun

He looked down at the floor, he was done. 

The gun went off pointed towards the sky

And hit this guy right through his eye!

I looked at Curly, scared and sore;

I just got done mopping the floor!

"Stay away from the blood!" Curly said to me,

"It's acidic to the touch, just leave it be."

A split second later the cops came by

They heard a shot and wanted to know why.

As they entered through the door

They saw the blood errode the floor.

Chorus (afterwards simply referred as Chorus):

I am the epitome of the white clan

I like cliche and romance

This tale is about star-crossed lovers

One an angel, the other a worker

A story of love, a story of God

A story that deserves no applause.

This will be a lovely woe

Sit back and enjoy the show

The time was around 9 o'clock

It was about time to close the restaurant

But the cops arrested us instead

Leaving the place open and dead.

I was in the back seat kicking and screaming a fit

The cops didn't wanna listen to it

They pulled me out of the car on tar

And beat me until I could see the stars

Curly yelled something to the cops

and then I heard a plethora of shots!

I was scared, helpless and it was dark

I was right in the middle of pedophile park!

I thought Curly was dead, but I was wrong

He was the only one left, the cops were gone!

I was confused, maybe I was dazed

But it wasn't long before Curly changed

He grew wings from a lightning bolt in the sky

A trident and halo appeared before my eyes!

He was an angel or something I presume

Maybe I was high from my expensive perfume.

Curly pulled me close to his robe

I got blood all over it from a wound.

He flew us back to the McDonald's like a jet

and laid me down on some trays to rest.

About an hour later I awoke

To the smell of gas and a room full of smoke.

There was a fire eminating from the kitchen

The smell of burnt fries and burgers made me stiffen.

"Curly, where are you, what have you done?!

The food's burnt, you stupid dunce!"

There was no reply, I was trapped!

I hoped to God that I survived this crap!

Chorus

Suddenly something punctured the cieling

It was my angelic friend Curly Leland!

"Quick, my dear friend Candy Rose

Let's split before this place explodes!"

He gripped me with his muscular arms

So soft, so tight, I loved his charm!

I snapped out of my trance when Curly launched to flight

A hard punch to the stomach, it felt like

Behind McDonald's was a furious blaze,

a crack in the ground appeared, sending seismic waves!

From the fault appeared a bunch of folk

Who were red, had horns, and tails with spokes!

I cried to Curly with confusion and fear

"I don't know what those are, protect me dear!"

He responded with a look to the skies;

I looked at him, fluttering my eyes.

There was a brilliant light from the trident

A beam shot out, filling the dark with brightness.

The beings cried out in despair

They scarmbled back to the crack in fear.

Curly set me down on a cloud,

Then he flew back down to the ground

A lightning bolt shot down from the sky

And gave Curly a sewing needle about my size

I watched my Curly stitch the Earth's wound

Hoping that after Mcdonald's gets its turn.

Sure enough, after the crack was mended

He let McDonald's go unattended.

He swiftly flew up to me 

He smiled and said "No biggie."

I slapped that dick in the face

He let McDonald's go up in flames

Chorus