what does family even mean

lyrics:

Am I toxic for trying to care

Am I failing for trying to leave

Am I a recluse cuz nobody's here

Or because nobody here can see me

Am I talking to nothing but air

Are all the ears listening in on the breeze

Are my lungs filling full of clean air

Or smog, exhaust and disease

Take care of yourself

I want you to be

Happy, healthy, thoughtful and wise

Don't look me in the eyes

Your life will only get harder

Yes I'm angry,

You are not what I despise

But that's life

Will I see you tomorrow

And I'm happy you've something to eat

And I'm angry so many are starving

And I'm sad I'm a burden to be

And I hate you think I am the problem

Now I wonder what I'm supposed to do

Should be miserable because of you

Should I be some stranger's good little whore

Isn't that what family is for

Repeat the chorus

Be free to die

Be brave for life

Be not afraid

We are all the same

There's no one to fight

Bereaved my love

We grieve together

We have deceived 

Each other

but through all the lies

The blades in our sides

we both hold the knife