The idea for this is freaking great. I only have a few small gripes. It sounds like everything was mixed a little too loud, and the mix itself is clipping a bit past 0 dB headroom, even in the beginning. It could be the clips of individual instruments as they render. It gives a bit of a fizzy whitewash that makes the rest of the track sound pretty centered.

For the guitars, it sounds like there may only be one centered low rhythm guitar. Standard practice for rhythm guitar is to mix two slightly varied iterations of your rhythm line panned 100% right and left respectively. You can humanize the left track's attacks and releases, as well as velocities, by a small percent, and change some of the amplifier settings to give a rich, open sound. It will also help your rhythm line cut through the mix without getting muddied up in the center. I can't hear if that's been done here due to some mixing decisions, like the heavy lead in the right and some other leveling which I will get to.

The track itself sounds like most everything is in the center and heavily compressed. Not that heavy compression is a bad thing. In this genre it's usually just fine. Part of what's adding to that centered sound is the snare is too far down in the mix, as is the rhythm guitar throughout.

I think the bass may be slightly too high in the mix, or should have a sidechain to the kick applied to it. The crashes are also a few fractions of a dB too high, along with fizzing transition noises.

Overall, it sounds really good. I think the low snare volume and just a little bit too much compression doing the job that a little bit more sensitive mixing could accomplish in bringing out the most striking elements of your track is most of the issue. I like to use audio signals from my percussion to auto duck the volume of any instruments that are consistently holding the same note or rhythmic lines, rather than forcing them all to the same volume with compression. You'll notice looking at your waveform, even on the more quiet portions of your track all are peaking at about the same or close to the same volume as your chorus, due to pretty heavy compression.

I would probably turn down your leads and other instruments, with the exception of the rhythm guitar -- that I'd turn up. It should give a sense of urgency to those builds, so you don't lose intensity, while slightly quieter auxiliary instruments will give some suspense.

Personally I recommend House of Kush's mixing tutorials on YT. He explains these concepts so much better than I do, in the mix more often than not. It's not metal, but the same logic applies.

Overall I really enjoyed the listen, and it's a nice take on the theme itself. Great work. You may have already implemented a lot of what I mentioned. If so, even easier fixes, just back off the compression a little and manually mix things before applying it, see what happens. Would love to see more like this :)

i genuinly love this