911 what's your emergency
UHH HELLO THERE'S LIKE THESE 5 CONJOINED PIPES WITH A DIGITAL CLOCK COUNTING DOWN ON THEM I THING IT MIGHT BE A BOMB CAN YOU PLEASE SEND HELP
How much time untill 0 sir
IT'S UHH UMMM 14 MINUTES
Ok we are dispatching a bombsquad now, how much time?
13 MINNUTES AND 30 SECOND [DISTRESSED RAMBLING] HOW MUCH TIME UNTILL THE BOMB SQUAD COMES HERE
OH GOD, I SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE
Sorry sir but we are gonna need a constant lookout for the bomb
Sir what's your name?
IT'S MICHAEL SMITH MISS!
Ok Michael it's gonna be a few more minutes untill the bombsquad. Are you alone right now.
YES I AM [MORE DISTRESSED RAMBLING]
Micahel: THE BOMB SQAD IS HERE
Bomb disposal unit: DOZER, I'M IN THE HOUSE!!! STAND ASIDE!!!
[Unit fondles with the device for a few seconds]
Bomb disposal unit: YES HQ THE WIRES ARE EXPOSED BUT THERE IS NO WAY OF KNOWING WICH ONE IS THE RIGHT ONE! UH UH OK LOOK KID GET OUT!!
Michael: BU-but my stuff
Bomb disposal unit: LOOK KID THIS BOMB IS AGAINST THE WALL AND I AM THE FUCKING WALL NOW GO!!!!
The bomb disposal unit failed to disarm the bomb and got himself killed on the funeral his tombstone was egraved with his last words:
"THIS BOMB IS AGAINST THE WALL AND I AM THE FUCKING WALL"
AN/ Yup today i was kinda out of ideas and played payday 2 up untill now and the bomb disposal unit was based on the Special unit called Bulldozer it's really fucking hot where i live fuck but yeah this is probably my shitties story with the best quote so far.