HeartMan's 2023 Valentine's Greeting
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When's the last time you took care of those lovely roses? Just yesterday? If that's true, then you wouldn't have to receive them year after year. And when's the last time you bought a bouquet of flowers that wasn't regulated to Valentine's Day? July? The Fourth of July doesn't count. Holidays NEVER count. Except for Valentine's Day, since that IS HeartMan's domain, after all.
What I'm trying to say is, what's the point of keeping those roses stifled up in your home, just barely on the cusp of full flourishment? Any plant you aspire to buy for the sake of a romantic gesture is just asking for trouble from HeartMan. Even those tiny Venus Flytraps they sell en masse at the grocery store are already half dead. You can't just cheat your way out of this, so the solution is to just not do it.
Unless, of course, you actually DO take proper care of all these Valentine's flowers. Imagine that, a decades-long lineage of red and white and sometime yellow endearment, all thanks to somebody who truly cares about lesser lifeforms.
In that case, HeartMan's rooting for you! It'll make the year you finally falter on your duties all the more satisfying.
Previous HeartMan Greetings:
2016 - 2022 Greetings (Archive)
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