Manifest your spectre: Pilot chapter (1/6) by GoofballPaul on Newgrounds

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Manifest your spectre: Pilot chapter (1/6)

Manifest your spectre is one of my ideas for a comic series. This post is the 1st of 6 batches of pages showing the pilot chapter.

I hope you like it! I'm very excited and a bit scared! This chapter has a cover + 23 pages, which I intend to post in batches of 4 images over this weekend and next week's. Do you think that this is a good way to post comics to NG?

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kurvec

2023-06-15 16:05:02

I love your style! It's so bright and colorful, and so clean. You managed to hit the perfect sweetspot in complexity of form in a vector artstyle, the airlock is a great example of this, it just feels good to look at. Composition is great too! The middle section of page 2 and the landing sequence in page 9 are very satisfying to read through.

Some of the smaller panels can get a little busy at a quick glance (in page 3, for instance), but nothing that detracts from the reader experience, and that's really an isolated critique anyway, as this problem doesn't really appear again in the other pages you published! The variety in speech bubble form is good also, the UI design on the integrated technology bubbles is great at conveying the user experience of such a concept.

Oh, and the writing and humor is great, too! I'd love to see where this goes.

GoofballPaul responds:

Thank you very much! It's great to have my choice on how to represent the "integrated technology UI" validated! This pilot tries to cram a myriad of unusual concepts and I'm very happy to hear I clearly conveyed at least that one well! ^0^

Still, there's more instances of characters sending and receiving messages later on, and that UI is slightly differently designed... in the future I should try to aim for more consistency... Oh well, this early exploration is what pilots are for! :D

I absolutely agree about the crammed panels in page 3, the panel density there is kinda ludicrous eheheh, the text walls don't help either. This being just the "pilot chapter", I of course intend to make a proper "chapter 1" in the future, one of the main goals of that future "chapter 1" is to add new pages in the beginning to put some of the exposition there, relieving the first pages of the pilot and letting me re-use them but with trimmed dialogue. This won't make page 3 have fewer or larger panels, but at least maybe I can make them have less text taking up space ^0^

And of course, moving on forward, I intend to make layouts in such a way that the panel density is lower across the board. I want future chapters to have more large panels with ample space given for characters and text to breathe, and proper attention given to spectacular shots. ^v^

The 8 remaining pages of the comic will go up this saturday (maybe sunday if something keeps me busy), after that I fear there will be a quite "dry season" of MyS content as I intend to focus on other personal projects for the foreseeable future. Though I hope my other projects catch your interest as much as MyS did! :D

Thank you again for all the feedback and support, it is very, VERY appreciated! <3

MagFrag

2023-06-11 18:06:58

It's got a great style, great art, and a good gag. I especially like the establishing shot that you have at the beginning. It must have been a massive PITA to draw this...

GoofballPaul responds:

The 1st panel was very laborious, but also fun to draw, so I wouldn't call it a pain per se. ^0^ Something that's a lot simpler yet more painful, at least for me, are any panels in which the cop robots appear, specially panel 3 of page 2, having all 3 of them each at different weird angles... I am thankful they probably won't be drawn ever again for the rest of the webcomic ahahah...