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Tarian

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Hey Hey kids of all ages, your dads back from prison and hes got a surprise for ya. A brand new character that I drew well over a year ago but never got to actually writing the stupid backstory for until the night before I post this. After this I have another character lined up and then I have to actually nail my hands to my drawing tablet and start coloring in all the other characters I got in my sketchbook.


Until then though I hope you enjoy my darling sweet baby biscuit

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She's mean, She's Green, Her blood content is 48% Nicotine. Tarian Madfall is a she-hulk whos testosterone levels are so high she would be considered radioactive within the effeminate jurisdiction of Canada.


Now despite the jaundice and the artificial growth hormones, Tarian at one point was actually a functionally normal person... functionally. Born to a poor family in the outskirt villages surrounding the larger Withikaw, really the only thing setting her apart from any other kid was the fact that her then pregnant mother ate GMOs and mutated her skull with large scales sticking out of her head. Growing up was your standard "Oh woe is me people made fun of me for being a disgusting freak wah wah wah" thing you're all used to from every baby's first traumatic backstory jargon, But the real interesting thing started when she blossomed heavenly into an industrial working age (a whole 11 years old!). The angels from heaven called upon her name and lead her by the nose to the pearly gates of an industrial slaughterhouse, the cherubs bestowing her with a glistening 6.45 an hour with the benefits of taking home the questionably sourced meat (?) for the rest of the family to enjoy! and well, Who was Tarian to deny the will of both god and the guy writing this shit? one problemo though, it was a corporate mandate that all employees wear hairnets on duty following a class action lawsuit where a hair was found in a can of pork soda. Those scales had to go, and one hacksaw and a real unfortunate night later, she made the cut (Edit: For those of you who aren't seasoned butchers, was a pun on steak cuts). The work conditions were rough: there wasn't any actual guard rails around the grinders, aggressive parasites would sometimes burst out of the cadaver, they always needed a new janitor (see previous) and nothing ever kept clean, and unlicensed operators loved to get real handsy with the meat hook crane when nobody was paying attention. But it wasn't all a terrible work experience, she took up a few hobbies. Her two favorite being chain smoking and cadaver defiling.


Following the Terrapinopian global war breaking out at her middling age of 16, her skills were deemed useful in the S.N.A.F.U. medical field because A. She was way too faded to care about the viscera and B. She signed a non-disclosure agreement saying she won't mention the civilian casualties in exchange for a serious boost in her income (12.75 per hour!!!). The gig wasn't half bad, and she excelled by killing people just as often as she saved them. In fact she got so efficient at both of these that she even invented her own weapon facilitated for it: The Sarcoduct. Its more than a Co2 tank, a pipe, and a meat grinder. It was also a good way to keep the trenches clean and dispose of any filthy cadaver of your once comrades/enemies. To add to the fun of the war machine her job became even more fun when her sister April, freshly laid off from her game warden job and looking for some opioid funds, got a place by her side. Together they got into all sorts of shenanigans, but surprisingly only ever got court martialed once. The worst offense of all: She shot the lead guitarist of the heavy metal battery for playing All Guns Blazing - Judas Priest on acoustic.


As they say, “all who draw the .500 Nitro Express Revolver will go to military prison by the .500 Nitro Express Revolver.” and well, Matthew 26:52 came to life that very same day when the Madfall sisters were put on death row. That was until it was decided by the union board of directors that a demotion from Corporal to Cannon Fodder would be more humane than the chair. And so we leave Ms. Madfall off reborn anew as the generals new personal errand runner, what a career so far.

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21
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Waiting for 4 more votes

Uploaded
Feb 3, 2024
1:44 AM EST
Category
Illustration

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