Howdy Everyone. If you guys may not know, tomorrow, November 5th, is the day I will be turning the age of 14. It generally felt like some months ago that I just turned 13. I guess that I have been keeping myself too busy.

I haven't felt so happy with the upcoming date though. Through the time of my thrusting thirteen's, I haven't been having the best time of my life. Nothing too serious, I just don't think I've been embracing my time while I had it. I've been working too much and too little, I have been thinking too bright and too dim, there has always been a outlier between anything. I've just been a 19 year old trapped in a 13 year old's body.

So now that I'm turning 14, I'm not so uppity. I felt like there was so much that I could do, but I just didn't live up to my potential that I had on the inside. But looking back, I may not have done much, but I have done quite a lot with my thinking, like drawing little low quality doodles and even writing tiny tidbits of scripts I've had imbedded in my mind, so I guess that I shouldn't look back thinking that I've wasted a year of my life. I may move on from that time period, but I can still continue.

About this art piece, this is a blender render of my sona being greeted with her 14th candle. I had many changes for this piece, (I've been thinking about it a for a long time actually. Mainly in tribute for my year of being a 13 year old) but I figured that making this simplistic style of her in blender would express the better result.(Unimportant: I also wanted her to look like she was receiving one of those stars if it was some Mario 64 type feel). It took me some time to decide on the lighting, and I wanted to make things a bit more atmospheric, but I just wanted to get this out here in time. Honestly the lighting didn't matter too much (Quantity over quality I guess).

Though this piece may be a bit of a reach, I thank you for your time to read this nearly page long vent I just dropped. This made me feel a bit better. Hopefully I can reset and things will get better. Or maybe I can just attempt to move on with my life. I don't want to be the angsty 14 year old that relies on depression to carry them along through humor, mindset, etc, I just want to take another chance at living, and see what I can improve on.

Thanks for reading and God bless.

-Akua