Why
Why don't you develop your own artistic style based on your personality and what you're trying to convey through your art rather than doing what 95% of everyone does: copying an overused low-animation anime style that's infinitely behind in all Japanese standards, but since it's in America it's always received with nonstop praise just because it looks like anime? Art is meant to be a medium for conveying your emotion and to try and get the viewer to feel what you want them to feel. What exactly should I be expected to really FEEL with this? I've seen this before over 500 times. It's the same exact thing as any other faux-anime American on NG.
Your voice-overing was pretty good for a non-professional, though. It's hard to push anger or yelling on a basic machine without sounding like you're faking it, so the way you did it was pretty good. The story you're writing here really left something to be desired in terms of substance. I'm not expecting Dickens, but I would like elements of writing rather than just fluff chat about power levels being conspicuously above nine-thousand to keep my attention to what's going on. Since the animation wasn't enough to do so, you should make up for it through writing. Put yourself into what you create, and it will be successful.
Once again, I expect just about every NG user to send me some kind of insult about how everyone should rate everything as a 10 if it looks like Dragonball Z or some crap. Just know when you're sending me your inflamed insults, when you review everything as a 10 and just say "hahahha flashy colors!", you're making yourself useless.