Hilarious!
This is great! I loved the story and Bjorn's great metaphors. "I felt like I've been hit by a truck, a truck filled with hammers and maybe some of those fish from earlier."
The only thing I would change is that you turn this into a series! Maybe have him bust out of prison or something. I love his voice and the background music is perfect.
Though I'm not usually one for a lot of swearing, the way that it's sprinkled in this flash is perfect, it's not too overwhelming and it's there when it's needed.
Great job!