"Welcome to the family"
I can't believe you didn't use faux "News" in this one, you seem to have colourful emotions towards them.
I admit I shed a tear during the last scene, if anyone sees this without having SOME kind of life changing -- nes... what can I say? You're not human.
And, on a side note, are you part of Mensa by any chance? There's at least 5 ways I can tell:
a) Your passion for world domina- erm.. world peace
b) You're Canadian.
c) Your type of humour (randomness)
d) Your biasness towards biasness
e) You're welcome to the family (*nudge nudge wink wink*)