"I can't no longer hear anyone talk."
I was about ready to close that window as soon as I opened it for your flash, but that sentence was priceless. That gave you my 5 in humor. Laugh-out-loud grammar jokes! Brilliant!
As a note, for someone that produces a lot of crap about giving other people crap, you sure can vary it well... you start another series every freakin' month! Way to keep us interested, red-haired... thing... whatever... do you even really have red hair or is that just a Pico reference?