I adore those lyrics.
You have a nice voice, I think in some parts it may have been neccesary for you too sing more fuller. Give you a better tone. ;) Especially during the chorus, it sounds like you're holding back and trying to sound prettier but I think it would be better if you just went for it. Just NAIL it. Otherwise you're singing is fine, and lyrics are FLAWLESS!
Love this song hardcore. =)