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Mutt Hoss

rated 0.24 / 5 stars
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Credits & Info

Nov 20, 2012 | 2:00 AM EST

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Author Comments

It just kind of drives you in. Half mutt, half horse, all MUTT HOSS.

Live the hoss, be the Hoss. Eaglerock Interactive brings you another adventure sure to guarantee joy. Music by unknown, a midi file I found.. Get you into the season and stuff.

Below is a walkthrough/guidethrough.
. Since
We'll start you off with an oldschool ERI logo, just to set it off, but then it's straight to action!

Hint: Press backspace to repreview ANY board you want! Like if you wanna see that logo again? now you can!

2 Z to attack, x to i dunno.. Well, go ahead and shoot that tree.. you can try jousting it if you want.. get to 80... I don't know why I decided 80..

3 OKAY hit up the logo. I drew this one myself. Charcoal, Pastels, the works. Traditional.

Okay now the hut is throwing guns around. You have to be ready right? Throw up them guns.

Okay eXtreme beach time. Ever been to the beach? well you and the eiffel tower can. Ever been to the eiffel tower? You can find it on a map if you want.

Glitchy sidescroller time. Run to the right and witness the amazing effects on a creaky old boat.. It's sort of like that level of uncharted 3

Animated background borrowed from King of Fighters, you are in another battle.. You have to give the big guy with a monocle something to drink to calm him down... press Z to throw wonderful mixed fruity girl drinks at him and he loves to drink them.

Next up, catch the flowers, dodge the lasers.

Okay PLOT BOARD.. Press H to neigh.. Press h on any frame to neigh. Enter continues.

This next frame paces for the next frame... Listen to the music... Wait for the moment, press enter when ready.

eXtreme winter beach volleyball time. You get the mutt as your partner, you spar against santa and one of his reindeer. A wonderful game... Press P when you're done playing..

You've reached the end. Yes, Mutt hoss may lack plot, simple in gameplay, but rich in beats and visual effects and will get you whispering about it to the next individual. Please share the wealth of the knowledge, be the Mutt Hoss, and yeah, just live it up sir and/or ma'am. Thank you for playing



Rated 0 / 5 stars

This game me cancer.

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Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

What the... this isn't a fucking game! But it's weirdly...addicting.


Rated 0 / 5 stars

this is not a game

ghettoflower responds:

It's so real, I know how you feel.


Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

You know for the lowest scoring submission I have to say.....

I am so confused if I love this or hate this. I mean what am I doing here? First I'm a jouster shooting Ice skater then i'm on a pirates ship....

I-I dunno what do I score this? I'm so confused explai the symbolism styfvsytvwabibsiubuiwwyywvwwviyvw *boomZ* my brain exploded from confusion


Rated 0 / 5 stars

I personally agree with the review Violet5100 gave.

I played the game, the Game functioned... if you call that functioning..

Now, I understand that this was one of your very early games, but even still. This game lacks proper instructions that doesn't involve the game being spoiled by a 'walk-through' hastily written by the maker, who clearly didn't take his own game seriously when you read it. only during the first screen where you shoot the tree did it tell you the button layout, and you even pointlessly threw in "x to i dunno", which might i add the shooting was broken and didn't actually shoot where you aimed but instead shot in the direction you last walked towards. The only other times you actually give on screen instruction is where the obviously modified sprite of a green Chu Chu from one of the Earlier Zelda games shoots drinks at mister monocle.. and that level is broken on a few areas, like the fact there is no right side wall, you can keep walking forever.Also you don't actually have to do anything it transitions automatically after a certain amount of time and doesn't actually have a lot to do with shooting the drinks. Ok next.. the Flower collecting.. on top of this being a game that plays itself, You call the <<<<<'s "lasers" in your Guide.. one minute on paint would of produced you significantly better laser effects. Next, The bit with the Horse bouncing around when you press space and neighing with H.. THIS should of been your Intro Board not the one with the eagle and the random sound clip, you could of used it to lay down the controls instead of having to paste it in a guide or in tiny text that doesn't contrast properly on the background like on the first bit or in monocle's case, where you pasted it in 'fancy' font on the background. Now, on to the final bit, after another transition that took no real talent to make as i doubt those musicians where hand made by you and was clearly just a looping animation pasted on to the transition. The Volley ball segment was really broken, the ball itself didn't bounce right as it would at times just flat out bounce stright up or down instead of continuing it's angled journey. Plus you still got point's even if it landed on your side, You can just trap the ball under your feet and let the score rise, that is until the ball suddenly shifts it's trajectory by 45-90 degrees and starts flying perfectly horizontal or Vertical for no reason. and now i find myself at the end of the game.The sprites are clearly ripped from elsewhere and you just used a harry potter "the end" screen shot.. Lets talk about your "guide"

First you obviously do not care, you are trying to make this game sound Deep "live the hoss, be the hoss."

second your "hint" of pressing backspace should be at ether the very top or the very bottom, not between your non-existent 1 and your actually labeled 2. and while I'm on the subject of numbers, Lets take a look.. you skipped 1 as I mentioned before. but you suddenly start counting at 2 then you give a 3, but after that you stop using numbers and resume the format from "1", the least you can do is keep your consistency.

lets move on to the next part.

Third, This Game, and I use that term VERY loosely, Doesn't even get classified as Random. You not only use cheap and nonsensical transitions that mean nothing to the overall game, you try to pass them off as something important in your "guide"

"Okay now the hut is throwing guns around. You have to be ready right? Throw up them guns."

Clearly you make ti sound like you control something in that scene though.. you don't.

or how about this

"Glitchy sidescroller time. Run to the right and witness the amazing effects on a creaky old boat.. It's sort of like that level of uncharted 3"

You not only made a glitchy side scroller ON PURPOSE, but you compared it to Uncharted 3??? I cannot even figure out how you made that leap of logic.

Your description of the Mister Monocles segment is your most filled out, but it's full of pointless bits like "wonderful fruity girl drinks at him and he loves to drink them" when clearly a simple "press z to toss him a few drinks" would of sufficed.. though again it's on a time limit and you don't actually have to do anything.

next is what you call the "plot board".... yeah... just no

from here you once again make the game sound deep or exciting, telling the player to take in the music and prepare yourself. I'll put this bluntly.. no one is going to need to prepare themselves, if anything they are fighting off the urge to fall into a coma of bordeem this game has given them by this point.

... "extreme winter beach volleyball time" i see no beach in the back ground only poor renditions of snow flakes, something that is 'supposed' to be santa and the 'mutt' along with to random sprites of a reindeer and the horse/pony you play as. these sprites oddly clearer in shape and detail then the only two.. but only by an inch and they contrast greatly making it look stupid and wrong. i wont go further on to this subject as i already spoke on how this segment is broken.

and your summary.. "Mutt hoss may lack plot,simple in gameplay, but rich in beats and visual effects and will get you whispering about it to the next individual" No.. it doesn't just have no plot, it has NEGATIVE plot as by the end of it your mind has already suppressed what it just endured and it never happened, No it isn't "simple" in game play, It doesn't HAVE gameplay. "beat and Visual effects" it has ONE song that you don't even know the name of that you probably picked at random in some old folder buried at the bottom of your drive, and those "effects" were not just bad, a 12 year in happy wheels makes better effects.

you get Zero star's today because you are clearly just a Troll who took sprites from the internet slapped them together and put in some code to make this "game" pass the screen process. there is a REASON this is and your other games is at the BOTTOM of Newgrounds score, you literally have to go to the 2817th page and you can find 4 out of the 7 you have ever made just sitting there, and you have 1 game that made one star and it isn't even findable in the same list i mentioned above. the site literally skips over 1400 pages at page 2813. and then your other two games SOMEHOW managed 2 1/2 stars but they both continue to be junk "games" that again don't even qualify as Random. Stop bribing the screening process known as "judgment" and get a new hobby.

From- Takashi

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ghettoflower responds:

Obviously the game meant so much to you to write out all that, meaning you indeed did like the game a lot. You took the time to analyze and study why you liked it.

Naturally I never asked for stars from you, and don't know who you are. But you're namedropping people I don't really know either. I have a feeling you might be related to them, either as a sock puppet or a nephew, but I said might and was only joking about the sock puppet part. I do believe that you are an individual and not a spam bot, but you could possibly be a good spam bot too. Your possibilities are endless as an individual. Considering this is your first and only review in almost 4 years, it's pretty much your only contribution and it looks like it's because someone linked you to it. It looks like you made a vendetta review, latching onto everything you can to justify why you don't like it. It's kind of an honor, and for that reason is why I didn't flag it as abusive.

I can see the emotion in the letters typed here, even trying to dissect my description. I've been clicking on the comments and reading submissions everywhere and I've never seen so much dissection of not only the game, but the description. It's kind of like where you're forced to dissect poetry in literature class and you're writing an essay worth of notes on 14 lines of rhymes. This gent isn't even getting a grade and has exceeded the first sheet of notebook paper.

Here's your entire newgrounds history:
Games Submissions: 0
Other People's Games Favorites: 0 Reviews: 1 <- THAT'S ME

So you join during Christmas vacation in 2009 creating the account essentially so you can bookmark some movies, and then out of nowhere review a game, taking the time to study it long and hard, determining which lists it shows up at, and Probably even took the time to browse through the other titles, and as you can see by titles alone, it only gets better, but it isn't better enough. But trust me it will get even better.

Gentle elk, ladies, here is one of the clear cut example why getting into game development is rewarding. You have folks who will break a 4 year vow of silence so they can crash someone's parade when all along they themselves were the hosts of the parade. If you haven't found the meaning of the game yet, THAT is the meaning. You too can be the people that sign their leet name at the end are the ones who define what to and what to not follow.

Send me a pm if this idea piques your interest and you are interested in becoming a developer yourself. It's not impossible. I've done it. You can do it. After all, it's everything by everyone. You read this far, you should reward yourself with a little work and do the same thing. Start with ideas you have.. Or even better, ideas you don't have. We can fill in the blanks as we go along!

And naturally I can't go into everything because it's just so vast this review, but thank you so much for taking the time and making this project and my future projects worth making. Even though you don't have any stars, you're still my shining star sir and/or ma'am.