Beat is on point, but this probably belongs in olskool sylistically. The mixing of the vocals could use a bit of improvement too. It's not enough to cut noise. Probably want to clamp some chorus, compression, etc. onto it. It sounds really dry. Lyrical composition isn't bad by any means but could use more content. There's a lot of points where it's just the beat, no obvious reason for entry and exit, etc. Also, some of your stresses on the syllables sound unsure, like you're searching for the beat. Keep it up though. The first part of success is the courage to begin.