Too drum-heavy
I feel like the original "Birth of a God" Song was not nearly as drumming-intensive or focused, and that was what really made the song shine. It didn't need a driving or excessive beat to get you pumped for a boss battle, the beauty was in it's melody, not it's drumming. I think you're overusing fills and cymbals, and it's detracting from the actual song itself. Too much random crazy stuff with the drums, but other than that, you kept to the original melody pretty well. THe drum stuff just marred it beyond redemption in my opinion.