But did you hear about the DEER that fell in the bowl full of sugar? And then my friend Lloyd and I came along, and he poured some mozzarella and pepper jack on top. The deer was fully aroused by this, and started humping the mozzarella and the pepper jack and the sugar in the bowl until 5 minutes later, it was all just this disgusting sloppy mess of sugar and cheese and deer semen. But the deer was completely unappreciative to Lloyd for providing the cheeses to top the sugar bowl. Not ONE thank you from that deer. Stupid entitled deer. Didn't he have any idea how much my bud Lloyd spent on those precious cheeses at the grocery store? So I yelled at that deer in anger, I said "OH DEER FUCKING SWEET CHEESES! THANK THE LLOYD!" And after that, the deer still didn't thank my friend, but instead shouted "hallelujah!" and then started praying to his arcane deer god or some crap for some reason. Isn't that weird? And then this big half-Indian half communist Russian guy named Rudolph came along and told the deer that his blasphemy had angered the weather gods and that the world would be engulfed in a thousand years of rain. The deer looked up at the sky and said "No, I think it's going to snow." And Rudolph said "rain!" And the deer said "snow!" And Rudolph said "Rudolph the red knows rain, deer."
You see gentlemen, THAT'S how we arbitrarily do horrible horrible contrived puns. That's how.