There's an interesting story told here, even if, personally, I don't approve the message, but if you plan to develop it into a full version, it will need several changes to become a good game. The first problem is graphics, which simply must be more detailed and have dark overtone to match the game's theme. Then you'll need to find another soundtrack piece, preferably from the martial genre. Finally, I think that writing requires some correction, since some of the game text sounds unnatural, even if there are no actual grammar or spelling errors.
Nevertheless, consider me intrigued. I realise that you only had twenty hours to create this, bund spend more time on it and the game may be a real hit.