As a general game, it's fairly polished, though perhaps lacking as a porn game. You have a lot of quests and running all over the place, but the sexual parts are light in comparison. Then again, you can only do so much for a NG submission, so it's forgivable.
The Air Hockey was really difficult because controlling the paddle with a mouse is nowhere near as precise as the real thing. Fortunately it played slow with a weak AI so it wasn't frustrating to play.
The dialog at the end should be tweaked, as a lot of her lines ran outside the text bubble, being cut off. I couldn't read what was being said.