I'd have to agree with some of the others...
It does have a very Coraline feel to it...might just be bad timing is all as Coraline is about to be released on DVD...
As far as design and story go, I think it needs something we care about in it...Here you have this story, but stories that are boring or don't catch our attention won't be remembered. Try to choose something Over The Top / Extreme. Yeah he has to "save" something which I now don't even remember though I watched this trailer not more than 30 seconds ago...Go over the top like Save The World or Save Himself...something that we can relate to and care about.
As a director you have to tell the audience "exactly" what they are meant to understand, while you might understand it, try to view things from a viewers perspective.
Hope that was helpful.
Ryan A. Garcia