You are Angry McGyver, the zombie assassin. It is written in the Necronomicon that you will fuck up Soviet Russia.
Neat game, great job.
You are Amanda McFucknuts, the drunk-as-fuck wetwork agent. The Fates foretell that you will make really bad hentai animations starring no one in particular.
You are Andrew Armitage, the hammer-throwing rapist. It is written that only you will offend Taiwan.
You are Baroness Stark, the meth-dependent voyeur. It is written in the Necronomicon that you will #trigger some SJWs while chillin' with Khorne, God of Blood.
Sounds like a party.
You are N***a of the funk, the utterly hammered succubus. It is written in the Slab of Destiny that you will confuse the fuck out of an army of 100,000 angry Soviet War Bears.