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WIP Need Opinion

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Author Comments

So can anyone help me with this;
I need IDEAS.


have a slug copter crash :D

snowbowlkirby responds:

I finished it


snowbowlkirby responds:

That's why it says "WIP"

What you have is pretty decent and it'll be interesting to see what you have for us in the future. But this is not complete, and without a story or plot with it, it's a pointless submission.

With that being said, please don't submit unfinished things to the Portal. If people submit unfinished things, then this will become an unimpressive site. Would you hang out on a site where none of the movies or games are completed? Think about it.

If you want feedback, tips, and ideas, that's fine, but this isn't the best place for this. The Portal is for finished items. The Forums are what you want. Load this into your Dumping Grounds. It's the third icon from the left at the very top of the page when you're signed in. It looks like a bucket with an arrow pointing down. Once it's loaded there, copy and paste the link into the Forums (Community>Forums). That way, people see it and give tips, which is what you want, but it's not in the Portal, filling your account with low scores or blams, which you don't want.

Also, at the bottom of the drop-down menu on the Games/Movies/Audio/Art tabs at the top of the page, there's an option for "Team Up!" That's where people come together to find voice actors, artists, writers, etc. That's also a good place to get ideas. Post your link there and find a writer to help with the ideas.


Good luck. :)

snowbowlkirby responds:

Okay, that would make more sense.
Thank you so much!

While I like this, it's not bad. but you can use Newgrounds dumps for unfinished work. I mean it's kind of cool, you don't see Kirby sprite animation things very often, although the music is kind of repetitive after action picks up. First off you kind of need a story that built to that point. They just kind of randomly appear on this random roadway.

The next is that you need to sequence things. It just goes right to action which I don't mind. But if it's going to be mindless violence, just make that the point. If it's going to have a backstory to who these Kirby characters are, make that the point (or part of the point). You have to actually storyboard or at least have a goal in mind you are working toward through the animation.

Your SFX quality and even video quality isn't bad at all, but the lack of plot development makes this confusing and kind of an obvious problem for the typical viewer.

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snowbowlkirby responds:

This was for fun...
Besides, It's a WIP.
There's no main story. The only story I'm doing is on dA, not here.
It's just a fight, nothing else. Besides, the reason I uploaded this was to get ideas for more of the fight.

The animation is good, even though sprite movies are a bit outdated, but what this is really needing is a preloader.

snowbowlkirby responds:

I sadly don't know how to make those, so there won't be for a while. :(

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Credits & Info

1.99 / 5.00

Jun 2, 2014
2:45 PM EDT