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8-Bit Streaker 2

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This was just bad, man....

...
um, yeah this... this is with out a doubt one of THE worst flashes, i have had the misfortune of playing...
WHAT IN THE HELL IS THIS?!
Brace yourself, as this will be given NO mercy... >:(
You see what i see here is not only crappy, lazy, worthless, and beyond simple of an idea, but i dare say this may not even be an idea... so you got a shirtless guy and you put him on lines for platforms?
Not only is the idea so junk, i dare say my 5 year old cousin could have DRAWN this game, and i don't mean that for the art i mean for the design.
Lets break down what is "here", shall we?
There is absolutely NO sound... music, sound effects, unaccounted for.
There are two screens that i guess you can call levels...
Hit detection is all over the freaking map, with random falls to oblivion, spikes that have more the double the the sane amount of size, for a hitbox. Stupidly coded Collection, in which anything above or below you can be captured as if you where walking into it. I was almost shocked when i played this again to insure i was just missing something that the spikes did not have as stupid as a hit detection as the coins and "end of level" flag.
Which brings up the collection point in general, which i can only say this... there is no point to it, no counter, no score, not even a collection ding, or for god sakes any indication you "collected" it. It just vanishes.
Controls are loose, but not that it matters a quadriplegic hamster could conquer these levels in seconds.
I "beat"? This game in less then ten seconds...
Story, with what i could tell you actually bothered to slam your keys with your face to make it.
Look in less then time i took to play the game i can write a better, one... You are nameless protagonist and some wisp (wind spirit) went and took your shirt, go get it.
Even that would be better...
the game is utterly broken, hell, broken isn't correct, it was put together with all the grace of a cow on crutches.
Guess what i can freaking do the left mouse click scroll down to Forward, and bam i can beat your game in less then a second...
And lastly what in the flying hill of fail, where you hopping to accomplish with this tripe?
First ever game?
First attempt at flash?
What?
Did you honestly tell your self that this was acceptable, did you play it yourself and go mmmhm yep that is good enough ship it!
This is not even an alpha cripes it's not even anything... its a few test screens.
NOW... as to what i can say to improve i am at a complete loss of what could be done to improve it honestly, anything better then a 2000 flash game would improve it.
HOW DID THIS MAKE IT PAST JUDGEMENT!? HOW!!!???
Blamming this won't even give me satisfaction, it should have not even be uploaded to begin with.
TAKE THIS DOWN AND DON'T BRING IT BACK, TILL THERE IS SOMETHING BETTER THEN THIS.
remember just cause its your first ever game doesn't mean we have to care. Or even have to be shown off.
FIX IT.

4FunGamingCo responds:

oh really?

why did you even make a game just to waste our time please dont make any more games

wtf do you do at omg my shirt

omg! i found his shirt was the worst thing i have ever seen on the internet, no joke!

Credits & Info

Views
5,166
Votes
33
Score
1.28 / 5.00

Uploaded
Apr 13, 2013
3:13 PM EDT
  • Turd of the Week April 17, 2013