You have good intentions it has potential let me give you advice;
Pro's: the grammer is good, you know how to make text boxes that are easy to read and for the buttons you have so far they work well none of that hit and miss stuff
Improve: people are harsh they like visual apeal, the bodies are a good size but the art itself needs improving. The back ground could also use some work but like the color sceme thus far anyways good luck have fun and I'd like to see how you improve. My rating is based on your strong points do not look at it as failure but as having lots of space to grow.

Glitches, the artwork is just..awful. Poor Ally doesn't even have matching sized boobs, for petes sake. How is this a demo when you cant even get passed a certain conversation with a different character? You yourself stated you rushed it, and seriously, I would rather wait longer for a WELL DONE product than a rushed ''demo''. Quality, not quantity.

Would be better if finished.

"I am going to probably go back and fix alot of the scenes but yeah I will be working on it." ...
First thing you need to do is make up your mind. Second, fix the broken buttons in this game.

Oh god syler let go of my eyes he's gonna kill me somebody hel--
Oh thank god he's gone.
*goes somewhere else*

...I WASN'T STARING!
...oh, that doesn't work. Well, uh...
YOU'RE HOT!
Oh wait, that doesn't work either.
BACK BUTTON
Er... where, uh, where IS the back button?

.___.

Keep, uh, making progress. Full game ought to be ok but I"m having trouble playing this one.