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Todd and the Bear

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Author Comments

the thrilling story of todd and the bear
CRITIQUE WANTED!!!!
it's german but there is only one word you wouldn't understand. but it isn't iportant for the story though.
my first flash with sound - so it's my first to upload to newgrounds.


Audio file(s) provided by http://www.audiomicro.com

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the colours and style was okay but....emm....lolwut it's this ._.

yeswekenny responds:

i don't know what to say. it's a miniclip / animation. it's nothing serious. but thanks for the 3 stars though :-)

His face at the end. XD

short sweet and to the point...bears suck lol

2/5 scored and 2/5 review

Work with Mouth frames, if you've ever taken a class on how to do basic animation, the first thing you learn is how to do mouth frames, what you have here are 2 maybe 3 poor mouth shapes, make at least 20, or at least one for every sound in the alphabet (not every letter, some letters make the same sound, as others in different words) Then for each word, take 2 or 3 mouth shapes that are needed to form the words with your mouth. It's quite simple, actually, you can do back grounds quite well but if aren't even going to put forth the effort to do simple things, you aren't giving me your best. So fix that please.

The script was terrible too, couldn't figure out what in the world you were trying to say before the bear ripped your face off.

Other than that, poor pacing but acceptable background and character models, buy a better mic and start practicing with mouth movement frames.

- Hollow

yeswekenny responds:

it's is not english. it's german. but i thought it wasn't that important what he says because it doesn't carry on the 'story'. but before the bear ripped his face off he said 'aber..' which means 'but..'.
i'm working on the mouths.
I'm only on the whole animating thing for like a month. so yeah

BUT your advice means a lot for me. so thanks! :-)
i'm going to improve what you said. this was really really helpfull.

geart art style in this flash... bad voice acting though... was okay.

yeswekenny responds:

thanks though. :-)

Credits & Info

Views
1,974
Faves:
1
Votes
8
Score
3.87 / 5.00

Uploaded
Aug 18, 2012
2:25 PM EDT