It is good you know how to draw, and your story is simple and nice.
However, in terms of graphic design and film, you might want to study the forms.

For instance, with graphic design. You could have used another line color than black. Though you will see crudely drawn animations at the top of the lists, they usually have refined color schemes or crafted line weights, and are not as random as they may seem.

In terms of film, you only use wide angles, and generally no motion, except lips, one head move, and one arm rotate. If you investigate the portal, you will see that comprehensive motion is at the center of good animation. That does not mean gratuitous motion, but motion, where even one line is moving, the entire piece seems to move against it.

You would greatly benefit from reading "The 12 Basic Principles Of Animation" on Wikipedia-which should start you with tons of good techniques to develop before again developing and submitting content here or elsewhere.