Don't Catch the Herp!

Share Collapse


Log in to save your medals! Don't have an account? Create one for free!

Give Me a Wet One 5 Points

Kiss The Girl.

Bar Hoppin' 10 Points

Escape the bar in under 20 seconds.

No Red Sores 10 Points

Survive The Girl's clutches.

Retro Pro 25 Points

Escape in your car in under 20 seconds.

Pattern Recognition 50 Points

Get away without retrying.

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Author Comments

Hai there!

Almost two years in the making, I present the ultimate depiction of the struggle of:
Good and Evil
Justice and Corruption
Freedom and Restraint


Action Button - SPACEBAR
Movement - ARROW KEYS

The following story is based on true events. All names of people and locations involved have been changed in respect of their privacy.

Love you.


oh my god! So this is what happens when a girl has herpes! O.o

I couldn't stop shaking throughout the whole game after the first time she beckoned me "Closer". Geez, it was like a moment of Closer by Ne-Yo. Only, not sexy.

Here're a few tips for other first-timers in this game.

#1: Get ready for screwin' the space bar real fast after the revelation that she has the H.

#2: When the drinking bar is in your way, jump, duh. When the geyser comes shootin', just be patient and give it a few seconds of waitin'.

#3: It's like Cross-the-Road frog thing, only, you gotta' get to your car, and BE PREPARED to run back with the madwoman in the road like a juggernaut getting every vehicle out of her way like a Goddess. Only, not sexy.

#4: Get your keys, scram. Oh, screw the space bar some more here.

#5: Don't worry, she won't let you go that easily. You'll have to avoid the ... weird purple hearts she shoots at your way after some time of just trying not to be run over.

#6: Then she utilizes this mega pincher thing that you have No. Way. Of. Avoiding. Cue to harass the space bar key.

#7: Cutscene, Judge Judy appears, robo vers. Here's what I answered [SPOILERS ALERT] No guilty; She has Herpes; No! She chased me!; HELL NO [END OF SPOILERS ALERT]

I was a free man at last. But I still can't stop shaking as I type this. Ewgh ...
4 Stars for the Potential Nightmare.
3.5 Stars for Gameplay (nothing special if you ignore the story).
5 Stars for Storyline (I refuse to believe such scarring event is real).
3 Stars for Art (your typical stickman with a face).
Overall Grading: 3.5 Stars

People find this review helpful!

one part is unbeatable the stupid geyser comes up.

I love it. Just love it

This is like awsome and i also think that when she was like...on the rocks then giggles this is so classic and awsome ...make more gamess man cuz you make some awsome games if you ask me :)

Click on an icon to vote on this!

Credits & Info

3.84 / 5.00

Jan 10, 2012
1:26 AM EST
Simulation - Dating