Postman David

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BIG D 5 Points

Beat the guy in black


Smash two with a single post!


Ascension from Noob status

WASTED 5 Points

Beat the bottle throwing guy


Beat both types of weight lifting guys!


Become a DH Club Member!


You scored over 1000 points in Mouse mode!


Get rid of the Emo king for the first time


Smash three with a single post!!


Cardboard David Status

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Secret Medal ????? Points

Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!

Author Comments

The message board has been invaded by noobs and all kinds of troublemakers. As David, your job is to take your post cannon and put them under control.

- Use WSAD or arrow keys to move. (Q, E, Z and C work for diagonal movement)
- Use mouse or space for shooting.

- There are two game modes: mouse mode and the unlockable classic mode, which can be unlocked by reaching level 10. In mouse mode you aim with the mouse and in classic mode you shoot in the direction you're facing to.
- Choose your favorite music to be played in the background. There is one pre-set default track (by Firestorm), but you may choose up to 8 extra tracks.
- 19 medals to collect. Tips for getting the secret medals can be found from the Hiscore screen.

Can you reach level 25 after which the levels get generic, and constantly more difficult? Can you get all the medals, and make your way to the top of the hiscore list? Can you beat the other people from your favorite message board?

If you encounter bugs (eg. with the music selections), please let me know, so I can try to fix them.

TIP: To get the "Postal frenzy" medal you'll need to postify 25 enemies during one rapid fire session. With only one Quick Reply powerup you don't really have enough time for that, but on some levels you get these QR powerups so often that you can collect a new one before the first one runs down.

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how do you get rid of that annoying Emo king???

JeffersonTD responds:

You need to lead him close to a towel while he's being chased by a lipstick-wearing smiley. This means that you'll have to survive till level 8 to get rid of the first Emo king(s), but once there, it should be quite easy.

Additional tip: you can slow him down by shooting him. This way you can try to keep him close to the towel so the lipstick-smiley can get close enough.


wow i was at level 7 and had to start over wtf once you die you have to start over

JeffersonTD responds:

Games are usually supposed to give you some kind of a challenge. Some do it on a level basis, but with hiscore games the game as a whole is supposed to be the challenge. This is basically a hiscore game so you're meant to start from the beginning.

Compared to many other hiscore games I think this is more versatile, as
- This game actually has different levels, not just an increasing amount of enemies or speed.
- To avoid tediousness, the levels are quite short.
- For diversity, you also get to do some choices along the way, for example:
** On level 4, you can decide if you want the possibility to take on the horse guys.
** On level 9, whether you want to shoot some fruits, see a cavalcade of weird characters or take on the vicious trollfaces.
** On level 12, whether you want a more regular smiley patrol or see a bunch of Emo guys with their counterparts (the choice "Love boat").
** On level 17, whether you want to start a Flame war or enter Genmay.

From the level 25 onwards the levels are all the same, but with increasing difficulty.

Any way, the point is that as you play the game
- you'll learn how different enemies behave.
- learn to be better at it in general, and thus...
- you'll lose less lives on earlier levels.
- you'll have more lives on later levels, and as you are better at those levels also, you get further in the game.
- you'll also learn to finish the levels faster and with better accuracy, which gives you more Bonus points when you finish each level.
- and as you get further and do it faster and better, you'll earn medals and get high in the hiscore list.

The postman!

I thought this was quite enjoyable because of how fun it was. Now, I will admit that the graphics didn't look too sharp in this. Then again, that could have been the point. It's really refreshing to play a game that uses such traditional artwork. While it is fairly dated, it's still nice to look at. I appreciate all the effort put into making this fun little game, although I'm not sure if the main person was supposed to be David Hasselhoff or not.

This website is known for making silly non sequitor stuff and this fit the bill pretty well. I like how you actually do have pretty good shading effects. I like how the shadows are cast. It's stuff like this that makes you dream of what it would be like to be an actual mod. I'm not much of an authority figure, so I probably wouldn't do well anyway.

JeffersonTD responds:

Thanks for the nice review! I'm glad you found the game fun!

That's also a very valid point that the main character could be anyone else as well. The reason for having David as the main character is actually the fact that this started as a small and silly inside joke, and there was a certain history with David there.


The game just keeps restarting itself as soon as the level 1 starts, it throws me back at the main menu.

JeffersonTD responds:

That's unfortunate. Sorry for that.

I try to reproduce the bug so I could fix it, but in the meanwhile just try starting the flash again. I think that should let you avoid the problem, and let you play the game, since I believe the bug itself happens very seldomly.

Credits & Info

3.68 / 5.00

Dec 30, 2011
9:33 PM EST
Action - Shooter - Multidirectional