in the beginning with the note that the Lego guy read, writing it with a moderately thin Sharpie would've worked and I see that because of the camera quality that you had to actually go in Flash and re-write the text with the brush tool. it doesn't look good. some of ti was downright illegible
yep, the song you chose isn't very suiting to a fight scene. i understand you have limited resources and all, but no music would've been better. also you can just get your music off YouTube or download music from the Audio Portal. look up "show no tears" by NemesisTheory. it's really good for that kind of scene and it sounds awesome to boot
i can see some marginal improvement in episodes 3 and 4. mainly because you used a computer to overlay text instead of writing it yourself and ripping it out and holding it manually. i'm glad you fixed this, especially since in my first paragraph i covered the illegibility issue
first episodes are probably one of the most important episodes of any show - they attract an audience and a potential demographic and if it's poorly done then you'll have to rely on somebody finding a later, better episode and that can really be bad since the plot will appear very disoriented. usually first episodes contain an organized setup of the protagonists that the show will center on for the next 9 parts.
even with limited equipment, tbh this could've been executed better. i can understand starting late in the story and then it evolving into a bigger storyline with more tension and characters that have depth
i think that's what you were going for here, but when it hit the credits it felt very disorienting and jumbling. i know you can't fix this since you already did this almost three years ago but i'll still cover this topic in case you ever decide to make another series or for whatever reason.
overall, this was disorienting and sub-par for a first episode, but this doesn't deserve a 1.47. good luck on your future endeavors
Again thank you. I have know clue what I was thinking when I had used paper for text. I guess originally I wasn't going to edit them into video, I don't really remember, but yeah.
There is some back story to it, not much but some. I'll admit, this isn't a very good thing for a first episode (it's a reoccurring thing I see in my work is the first episode is usually the worst...). Yeah, I do plan to have some stuff after part 10, this story line is concluded, but this is only a small part in the big picture. I've had a script for a "chapter 2" sitting on my computer since maybe late 2010, early 2011. I haven't had time to get any work done on it, but I really need to. It's going to be far superior to anything else I've ever done, and the production values will be great (since I've improved over the years, I have an editor that uses Sony Vegas pro, so tons of fancy edits there). Well, I'm glad you're staying true to your word, and actually watching all of these. Part 10 is definitely something to look forward to, it's 7 minutes long, scripted, and it looks great, hopefully the file size isn't going to kill me... Well, hopefully parts 5 and 6 should be up tomorrow, and hopefully I see more of your reviews.