I was expecting this to be silly or just some kind of shitpost, so I was a bit disappointed to see this. Maybe make it more funny by adding random goofs about Mary Sue characters or play some music in the background.
it has a lot of potential
it is of course only a demo and thus, it's kind of short. I found this game quite amusing though. looking at this, as well as your other creations, I'd definitely say you have talent.